Welcome to Hell

Contrary to what you may have been told

The revolution will be televised

Broadcast in HD and 3D

Sound optimized for your Beats headphones

Sponsored by Pepsi, McDonalds, and Visa

Streaming live


Available for purchase on iTunes

Just added to Netflix

Tyrone might even have it on bootleg when you walk out the door

Don’t forget to get your t-shirt…

We are going to welcome Idris Elba, Michael Ealy, Megan Goode, and Halle Berry to the stage

And no…

They are not talking…

But while I have your attention…

I’d like to welcome you to hell.

Where a college dropout

Knocks up a rich girl

And they name their kid after a direction

And I’m supposed to give a fuck.

Where boughetto broads from Texas

Marry dope dealers from New York

And they name their kid after a color

And I’m supposed to give a fuck.

Yes… welcome to hell.

Where a million white people

Buy a cd

And can’t sing along

To a song named after another white person

Guess they aren’t supposed to

“Clap for a nigga with his rappin’ ass”

Welcome to hell.

Where reality

Is scripted

And everyone is pumped about a show

Changing the meaning of SCOTUS

Side chick of the United States…

Let our girls all grow up to be

Highly intelligent


Jump offs…

Welcome to hell y’all…

Where people care more about

Former Disney stars twerking

Than the slow death handed to them

Courtesy of super corn at their favorite super store

Attention WalMart shoppers…




Where no one is genetically superior

Because everything is genetically modified

Where teachers teach to tests

Our kids can’t even read

And socially promoted bad asses terrorize

And the fourth goal of the teacher’s union is high quality education

Oh yes…

Welcome to hell!

Where the pro life

Are pro guns

Yes hell…

Where no we won’t teach you about sex

No we won’t help you get birth control

No you can’t have an abortion

No you can’t get free health insurance

And no you can’t get daycare assistance

But see what you need to do is get off your lazy ass and work.


Where I am both unconscious and assimilated

Because I bear no opinion on the fugitive status

Of those who desire to win a game of chess

By knocking over the board.

You see…

This is Hell

Where we tell our youth

To change the game

But don’t give them the tools

Required for the job.

Where the legacy of slavery

Is alive and well

Defibrillated every time

We tell someone not to vote.

Welcome to hell

Where you should ignore the process

Hate without knowing

Think as you are told

And blame the whole for the errors of the part.

Where one slice of pie hits the floor

And we need to throw the whole thing away

That’s how we roll here in hell.

Where we blame the creator

For what we’ve created

For where we choose to dwell

For who we choose to be

Where love is a sin

Hate is the norm

And we judge people

As easily as we breathe

Welcome to hell

Where no one is a slave

Everyone is righteous

Everyone is a teacher

Everyone is awake

Where nothing I have said

Makes any sense

Because y’all choose to stay awake in this dream

While I sleep in reality





-Turtleberry 2013

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